What's Love Got to Do with It?

A dear friend of mine has fallen in love, again. After an abrupt end to a 25-year-relationship, it has taken him a little while to realize that he's ready, but he is. In the beginning, he was devastated. It was so very sad to watch. But his new love interest has many things going for her - not the least of which is she's a "hiker" and a "walker." And, although she's about 12 years younger than he, there's no doubt in my mind, he's willing to step up his game.   

For a time, I was his heroine because I did something for him that made him see me in a different light. This lasted for about two weeks. I didn't want to be his girlfriend. I knew it all along, but he didn't.  So, I made sure that my behavior toward him, at all times, could be interpreted as no more than that of a close friend. And, now he has moved to the next square on the game board of life relationships, while I have stayed on the one marked "friend." I think it's worked out well for both of us.  For purposes of this post, let's call this guy, "Jim."

Now, the reason I mention Jim is because at our usual coffee meet-up over the weekend, I noticed an interesting change in his behavior. Mind you, he hasn't told me that he's seeing someone yet.  Most of the time, when we meet for "coffee," what we are really doing is meeting for dinner at our favorite delicatessen. My standard order is a half-salad-half-sandwich combination, with water to drink.  Jim's is usually the same or similar. I place my order when I get there, and he will place his when arrives usually 15 - 20 minutes later. Mine was served to me while I was chatting with another friend of mine, who was sitting at a nearby table, Meg.  Having just come from work, it took Jim a few minutes to place his order and bring his personal things to the table. At any rate, when Jim's order was served, I was amazed to see what he was eating for dinner - not because of what it was, but more so because of the quantity. Or should I say "lack of it?"  Here goes: One cup-serving of mixed broccoli and carrots, and one cup-serving of macaroni and cheese, with water to drink. That's it - after working 10 hours that included a 45-minute lunch break consisting of walking, walking and more walking.

Please know that Jim is not a heavy man.  In fact, he's a little on the lean side; but, he certainly can't be described as "skinny," either.  And, he's in great shape for his age.  So there you have it - a perfect example of a man doing what women usually do to reach what we so lovingly call, "dating weight."  

As for me, Jim gave me a gift that night, and he never even knew it.  With pleasure, I watched his example of disciplined and controlled eating.  I love to see people "walk the walk." And, I'm pretty certain that he may have followed it up with another very small portion of something later in the evening, but here's the deal: He's never been a binge-eater, over-eater, or night-eater, and his health records and body image reflect that. So I'm pretty sure that whatever his choice may have been for an evening snack, it was a healthy one - certainly not ice cream, cookies or extra-butter popcorn.  Good for him!

It may seem like a small gift to some; but, in fact it, was a huge one for me.  Our coffee meet showed me that this portion-control idea can and is actually being practiced. And, while I'm not really a fan of one-cup servings, I do know someone who practices this kind of eating discipline and is reaping the benefits from it. So, there you have it. You ask "What's love got to do with it?" and I'm telling you.

Imagine how much Jim's life will be improved  - and on so many levels! On a more personal note, just imagine how pleased I am to have a real, live example of disciplined eating right in front of me. And, while I know I'll be seeing less of Jim in the future, I also know that he'll remain exactly what I wanted him to be: My friend.   Lucky him, lucky me, and lucky Miss Whatshername. Everybody wins in this picture! 
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